Parent Gossip Often Has Consequences for Teenagers

by Clark Kissiah
Culture Editor 
    When discussing the high school rumor mill, it cannot be denied that fingers are more often than not pointed at underclass girls and their relentless smack talking about each other and rival groups. In truth, everyone is guilty of exchanging information, whether it is positive or negative, deliberate or accidental. What we over look, however, is the role parents’ play in rumors and the consequential formulation of forever lasting, and often hurtful, impressions and opinions. It is one thing for high school students to gossip about each other; at least it directly deals with their demographic. Parents, however, have absolutely no reason or excuse for gossiping about students a generation beneath them. In the high school world, sad as it is, rumor spreading and gossip through the parent network has been responsible for harming the reputations of students, and is a trend that needs to be addressed. 
 
    Everyone likes to talk about things that are important and directly relevant to their immediate worlds; it’s how we build friendships, relationships and convey our feelings. This communication only becomes an issue when we start to discuss people that are not present. These conversations seem to undergo a subtle shift of focus from a closely related person or instance to a more distant third party member. This is when the conversation should end. There is no justification for gossiping about people who are not included, and are consequently unable to defend themselves. This is how facts get altered, and stories misconstrued. While we do not intend to accuse parents of being the gas and igniter of high school rumors and drama, it is important for parents to be aware that their conversations can be just as hurtful as those that take place among students. 

    Gossip is unfair and horrible as it is, but when parents get involved, it is a hundred times worse. Take the average rumor, “Suzy got drunk at a party and hooked up with Bobby.” Suzy is in a bad position because her peers now associate her with alcohol and Bobby.  When an overzealous mother who knows Suzy from middle school hears that she got drunk and hooked up with Bobby, Suzy all of a sudden undergoes a drastic metamorphosis from the sweet girl this mother once knew to an alcoholic slut; and for some parents this newly acquired information must be shared to ensure that Suzy does not contaminate anyone else’s daughters. The situation may seem contrived, exaggerated and above all, ridiculous, but it happens all too frequently. 

    A common position taken by parents is that it is necessary for them to know what is going on with their children's friends, and the people they directly associate themselves with for safety reasons. While this is a perfectly reasonable position, there is another side to this belief.

    Parents involved in the high school rumor and drama circle are displaying a notable amount of hypocrisy. How can someone tell a small child that it is not acceptable to call someone a bad name, then turn around and tell the afternoon book club that Suzy is a slut? The cherry on top of it all is when the rumor is false and Suzy didn’t even go to this party, nor did she get drunk and hook up with Bobby. 

    This entire situation is just sad. It really is not necessary to gossip about fourteen to eighteen year old kids. I understand that Los Gatos is not exactly the most eventful place on the planet but seriously parents, talk about something other than your kids and their friends. The country just elected a black president; I would think there are more intellectually stimulating topics to discuss than Suzy and Bobby.